7 Quick Takes

1. Our stove was red tagged last night. I thought all day that I had been smelling gas. And I felt like I could smell it everywhere. Before I left for tutoring, Brian came home from work and while he faintly smelled something in the kitchen, he did not smell it near as strongly as I did. My dad told us that we could call the gas company and they'd send someone to check for any leaks. (Seems like an obvious solution.) So Brian did that. And guess what? The stove was leaking gas. So, it's red tagged and we're waiting on parts to come in before we can fix it and use it again. Looks like the microwave and toaster oven will be the way to cook this weekend. In all seriousness, there was a huge house explosion caused by natural gas just across the border in West Virginia this morning (very close to where I attended school.) The house is leveled and one teenager died. We are very blessed and beyond thankful that the leak was detected before something awful occurred.

2. We headed to Soergel's Farm this morning to hang out with some moms from Mommy's Group. We didn't get to stay nearly as long as I had wanted (had to meet the stove repairman), but my boys had a blast. Noah ended up falling in a large mud puddle, and Matthew purposefully rolled in the same puddle. He then removed his pants and underwear while I was tending to Noah and was standing in the middle of the play area stark naked from the waste down. Parenting fail. But the good news is that they both had a wonderful time and loved the little break from the city.

3. This weekend is the Diocese of Pittsburgh's 2nd Annual NFP Awareness Sunday. Being trained NFP Promoters, Brian and I are responsible for doing something at our parish to promote NFP. We put up a large trifold board with all kinds of fun facts in the back of the church along with some pamphlets. We are also mentioned in the bulletin. And I have a strong suspicion that Father Jim will somehow weave NFP into his homily on Sunday and his homilies about NFP are pretty much the bomb. We are excited and ask for your prayers that many hearts will be converted this weekend and that many couples can recognize the goods the come from practicing NFP instead of artificial contraception.

4. After the repairman left this morning, the boys and I got crafty with our baby pumpkins that we picked up at the farm. (We will go to a different farm at the end of the month with my parents to get big pumpkins, so we opted to get the tiny ones this time around.) We decided to make bat pumpkins. We painted the pumpkins, glued on eyes and wings and now we have bat pumpkins. Matthew made the wings for his pumpkin. I had to help Noah. It was again, an easy and fun craft. I highly recommend trying it out.

5. Noah went to this ENT this week for his usual 6 month follow up. I already knew he had an ear infection before we got there, and we had started drops a few days before. Well, it turns out one of his tubes is completely blocked. And on top of the infection in his ears, he also has a pretty bad yeast infection going on in his ears, too. He is now on two sets of drops. We are praying that this clears the blocked tube and he can start into the colder weather with healthy ears. We really do not want to have to replace the tubes, and we are discouraged that they haven't worked as well for him as they did for Matthew. Please pray his ears get better quickly.

6. This weekend we are heading out to the Dormont Street Fair. I love the street fair. It is such a fun, free community event. (Well, it's not free for us because we definitely indulge in all the local food offered, but it doesn't cost anything to attend. :)) The boys love seeing all the fire trucks and playing in the kids area. Last year I met a politician who was a huge fan of Propel Schools, and he picked my brain for a while about why the Propel Way works. It was awesome. This year a local band, The Justin Fabus Band, will be performing. We first saw them open for the Hillbilly Way in January and April. The best part is....I went to high school with Justin and was in chorus class with him. Great guy. He has no clue who I am, but he was pretty popular back at KO. Everyone knew him. I am happy to see a local guy have a lot of success.

7.This past week, one of my students was having a hard time because his grandmother is dying. (They were actually taking her off of life support today, so offer a prayer for them.) His mom and I had a heart to heart with him, and during the conversation, I mentioned I had lost a daughter a few years ago. At this point, his mom starts crying. She, too, had lost a baby girl many years ago. And just like that: BOOM! Instant connection. We hugged and then made plans to meet for coffee next week. This family is truly wonderful and I work there three hours each week. I knew I always felt especially connected to them, and now I know why. Thank you, Holy Spirit, for prompting me to share so personally. I have gained another friend. :)

And on that note, have a happy, enjoyable weekend! :)

Five Faves

In no particular order...

1. Fall Crafts

 

My mom bought the supplies (thanks, Mom!), and Matthew and I put together a great Halloween wreath for our front door. Now, we don't celebrate Halloween all out in this house (All Saints Day is our day to party), but we are Catholics in the world, therefore, the kids dress up and go trick or treating and we buy pumpkins and carve them. I thought the pieces for this wreath were cute and not offensive, and it looks great on our door. They were super easy to put together, too. One day I'll learn how to make a nice bow and add it on. For now, we are happy with how it turned out.

2. Diet Pepsi

I am a Diet Pepsi addict. In fact, I knew I was pregnant with Noah before I took the test because I could no longer stand the taste of it! (And the same had happened with Matthew during the first trimester). Without it, I would certainly die of exhaustion. I know I'm probably killing myself slowly, but right now, this sleep deprived momma will keep on chugging.

3. Toddlerobics Class

The boys take a Toddlerobics Class each Wednesday morning. Miss Christi (the same Christi who trains me) teaches the class, and she is Matthew's favorite person. The class is fun and involved music, activities, and lots of movement for the little ones. My boys love going, and it's super cheap. I think I paid $45 for each kid and it's about 8 sessions in length. Each session is 45 minutes, just the right amount of time before you start losing toddlers' attentions. And Christi, as usual, is super high energy and just wonderful. It's a good time for all.

Sorry the pics are blurry. The class is constant movement. Christi's in the Nike shirt, if you couldn't tell. ;)

 4. Bethenny's Talk Show

Okay, so it's no secret that I am a HUGE Bethenny Frankel fan. (And, yes, Brian has watched every episode of the her reality show with me. He finds he relates to Jason a lot and I relate to Bethenny. Don't worry, we are soooo not headed for divorce like them!) Anyways, her new talk show that airs at 11am on WPXI each day is pretty hilarious. She just tells it like it is, and I have a feeling that had we met in real life before she was famous, we would be friends. She could just say everything I think but filter most days. Anyways, check out this video parody she did of the song, Thrift Shop. It's pretty hilarious.

5. Father Jim

Father Jim has daily Mass at St. Catherine's this week, and while the other priests we have at St. Catherine's are wonderful, there is just something special about Father Jim. He just truly celebrates the Mass with a great reverence and sense of humility. I was afraid I would never find that outside of the Oratory, and I am so blessed that we have. It is edifying. And Matthew is president of his unofficial fan club. It's a win-win for all!

Have a great Wednesday, everyone!

Modest is Hottest?

Note: I am well aware of the Church's teaching on modest dress. I do not disagree with it in any way, shape, or form. I do, however, believe that it can be taken to extremes. This post expresses those beliefs.

Since getting my body back into shape, most of my clothes are a bit too big. I finally got some jeans that fit (but even those will need to be smaller soon. Nothing is more unattractive than baggy jeans.) I have been slowly replacing pieces of my wardrobe as I see things that are on sale or that I like. I mean, we're not making millions so I can't just afford to run and out buy a magnificent wardrobe every time I lose weight. So I'm trying to wait it out a bit.

But our five year anniversary is coming up in less than a month. And with that anniversary comes our getaway! Yay! One of the reasons I started letting Christi kick my butt way back in the beginning of June is because I wanted to buy an amazing dress for our anniversary. I want to look super good when we go out for our nice dinner to celebrate five wonderful years of marriage. I want to feel good about myself, and I pretty much want to knock Brian's socks off.

So, I've been looking for dresses online just to see what's out there. I will probably actually purchase one in person (because I can't buy a dress online. No telling how certain areas will fit) in about two weeks or so. And of course, whenever shopping for any item of clothing anymore, the question of modesty always pops into the back of my mind. What is okay to show? What's not okay to show? Does this dress cross the line? Is it too short? Too tight? It's maddening!

When Brian and I were dating, I feel I dressed way more modestly than I do now. We weren't married, and there were just certain things that should be kept a secret at that point. I certainly did not wear a habit, but I made it a point to make sure I pretty much dressed like the infamous Sister Wives of TLC do on a daily basis.

These days, I do things a little differently....at least on date nights when Brian and I get out without the kids in tow. On those nights, I want to look a little extra special for him. He comes home to find me in jeans and a tshirt or sweatshirt and doesn't see me looking that put together that often anymore. (Side note: I take great pride in putting on make up and straightening my hair every morning, so it's not like I look like I just rolled out of bed. I'm just dressing way more casually on a daily basis than I did when I taught every day.) I want to take the time out to make myself look extra nice and to make him interested. We get so caught up in being Mom and Dad every day that sometimes we forget what it means to be husband and wife.

I don't feel I dress immodestly, but I tend to leave a little less to the imagination on date nights. Brian and I are married now after all! I always try to keep it classy and not trashy, and Brian has always said that if he found something I was wearing immodest, he'd let me know. And I fully believe he would say something, even it meant sleeping on the couch that night. ;) But I honestly think that with your husband, different rules apply for modesty than if you're going out with just the girls.

I have looked at a few dresses that have long sleeves and cover from my knees to my neck. (Our anniversary is in October, and we are going to be lakeside so it could be chilly) But I know Brian's not into that. And it's really not my style either. I want to show off some of my hard work from the gym this summer. Does that mean I have to dress like a street walker to accomplish that? Absolutely not. But I do believe there's a point at which one can be too modest and too worried about making sure absolutely nothing is showing. 

That point of view is great and well and good in dating. (And trust me, if we are ever blessed with daughters, there will be strict rules about what is appropriate and what isn't.) But sometimes I think it's okay to dress to show yourself off when you're going out with just your husband. It's good to get him interested. It's good for him to think you're amazing and beautiful. It's wonderful for him to look at you as the woman he fell in love with and not just a tired, worn out Mommy (which is how I feel I look at the end of most days.) It's good to feel like you look amazing. Those things are all okay. We are certainly not called to hide away our bodies. (Nor are we called to let it all hang out!)

I'm not writing this because I think the world is too modest. Oh my, no. The world is way too far in the opposite direction. But sometimes as a wife, I need to make sure I'm not going too far the other way. There has to be a happy medium. I hope to find that when shopping for a dress in the next few weeks. In the end, as long as it turns Brian's head, that's all that matter. And it's a good thing if the dress I finally decide on for our anniversary leaves him speechless, too.

Being Catholic in the Real World

I like tell people that I spent five years in the glorious bubble known as Franciscan University of Steubenville. (4 as an undergrad at main campus with one semester at the mini campus in Austria, and one when Brian and I were dating/engaged as he played the role of assistant mens's basketball coach.) It was a great, Catholic environment up on its own little hill. And it was wonderful there. Everywhere you turned people were calling you on to live the faith. Everything was Catholic. You didn't have to think much about defending your faith because that wasn't necessary. Every class (yes, even my mathematics courses) had Catholic undertones. It was really pretty cool, and whenever I make a student loan payment each month I feel great peace knowing that it was worth every penny (most of which were shelled out by parents) to attend there. I wouldn't trade those years for anything. (Including going back in time and taking the free ride I was offered at a different college.) Nope. The debt from Franciscan is good debt for sure.

For five years now, I have been living the faith full time in the real world. I have broken out of the Catholic bubble, and oh does it feel good! I've always had a very Opus Dei mindset about the faith. I know we are called to live our faith deeply and truly, but I honestly feel called to live it out most in the day to day operations of my life. When Brian and I were dating this is one thing we both very much agreed on from the start. Although he had been in the seminary for a good period of his young adult life and I had spent most of mine living in my favorite bubble (I mean that as a good thing. The bubble allowed me to grow in my faith in ways other campuses and schools would not have allowed at the time for me.), we both felt called to live out the faith in our lives in the real world with our children.

So what does that look like? Does that mean we check the faith at the door each time we leave the house? Do we compromise the Church's teachings or beliefs? Do we not defend the Church when she needs it? No, no, no, and no. Living the faith in the world means the faith comes with us EVERYWHERE. We don't turn our home into a little Catholic bubble and just stay there. We come back to our little bubble to refresh and recharge and then venture out with the faith in our hands into the world every day. (I may add that I am a member of a Catholic Moms' Group, and that, too, is a wonderful, much needed bubble where one can go to recharge!)

We don't shut out the world. We listen to modern music (I'm a big fan of Britney Spears' Womanizer right now to run to. I know it's only like 4 years old. I'm catching up!) We go to concerts when we can. We watch modern day television shows (I am counting down until Grey's Anatomy premieres!) We read modern literature. (Mary Higgins Clark, anyone?)  We take advice from sources that aren't always Catholic. (Bethenny Frankel's Skinnygirl Solutions has changed the way I eat and think about food. Dr. Laura Schlessinger's The Proper Care and Feeding of Marriage has changed my entire view of how to be a good wife to Brian.) We enjoy what the world has to offer. (Now, clearly we don't indulge in the evils the world has to offer, but we enjoy what is good about the world.) All the while, we don't lose our Catholic faith or identity.

My faith comes with me when I tutor. When I'm particularly frustrated that a student hasn't done a homework assignment since the last time I saw them, I try to take deep breaths and remember to see them as God sees them. Brian takes his faith to work with him, too. How can you serve adults with intellectual disabilities without the faith? I take the faith to the gym. (There are some awesome Rosary apps out there, btw.) Matthew takes the faith with him into school, and I pray that continues for the rest of his school career. We take the faith with us to concerts. And we bring our Catholic ideas and ideas about our faith to whatever we happen to be reading and apply them there.

In a way, everyone lives the faith in the real world. We certainly know lots of modern, Catholic families striving to do the same thing we are. But there are those bubbles throughout the world where Catholics just associate with other Catholics. Franciscan is the biggest one, but at that time in young adult lives, I think it's needed. And some people are called to always live within the bubble. But our family is clearly not called to do that. We embrace this modern world and take it on on a daily basis. And when we need a little break and refreshing, we come back home to our mini bubble and gear up to take on the world all over again. Now, after five years, breaking out of the bubble is finally starting to feel normal and good. And I wouldn't trade this living in the real world thing for anything either. :)

Back to School

Today was Matthew's first day of preschool! What a big milestone. He did so well, too. I walked him into his classroom, and he hugged me and ran off to play. I was the first parent out of the classroom, and I was so proud of my little man. I don't know where the past three and a half years have gone, but they sure have gone quickly!

For our family, this is just the first year of many of Matthew leaving the house to attend school at a school. We may be devout Catholics, but we have chosen not to homeschool our children. (Okay, so after Obama was elected again and DOMA was overturned, I may have seriously considered it in a moment of complete panic, but then I came to my senses.) I want to preface this post by saying that the families we know in Pittsburgh who are homeschooling are doing a beautiful job. (My freshman year roommate from college even spent some time as a homeschooler, and she's one of the coolest and smartest people I know. Guess that's why she's Noah's Godmother!) They are examples of homeschooling done well. And I fault no one for choosing to homeschool. It's your right as a parent. (Just please use a curriculum. :)) Homeschooling has many benefits and can be great when done well. I don't argue that at all. But there's something to be said for sending  your child off into a school building, too. That, too, can have great benefits and blessings.

Here's the thing. I'm a teacher. So lots of times people look at our family and are a little surprised that we are not homeschooling our children. Let's forget the fact that I never, ever want to teach my own children beyond helping them with homework and helping them learn study skills. (Does that make me a bad mother? Probably. Oh, well. Judge away.) But here's the other thing. I am a teacher, and thus, I have a special place in my heart for the tradition of children in America going off to school on a daily basis. I think there's something to be said for sending your child off to school and you serving in a supporting role as the parent. I think someone else teaching our children is a good thing.

I get that schools (Catholic and public) are not perfect. They are not perfect little examples of living the faith on a daily basis. They are fallen. I can completely understand why for some families, dealing with those school failings involves the decision to homeschool. Sometimes it's the only way to make sure your child is getting a good, Christian upbringing. It makes sense to want to protect your children from the things in the world that aren't always the best example of Catholicism. But then the educator part of me kicks in.

I love the idea of public education. Yet, I see schools failing in America. I see students being failed by the school systems. And I just can't stand by and pull out of the system completely as a way to fix it. I feel to fix it, I need to be involved. And I so badly want to fix it. I need my opinions and voice to be heard. By pulling out of the school system, my voice will not be heard, and things will only get worse. Education can be fixed. Catholic schools can be fixed. But we as parents need to pull together with educators who care and fix them. We can't just keep pulling out and away. The whole system at that point is only doomed further. If all the good people pull out, what's left? I refuse to abandon a system that I believe can work and at one point, did work for this country. I refuse to believe that the way to fix it is by pulling out of it. I mean, parts of the Catholic Church are broken, and I didn't just decide to stop going and become a different religion. I chose to stay a part of it, and to try and fix it from within. That's just what makes sense to me.

At some point, it may prove impossible to fix anything by ourselves, and it may show us that it's better to keep our kids home and use a cyber school curriculum. But I'm not sure that will be the case. Only time will tell. I can't really see the above scenario happening, but I know getting involved with a school and having your voice heard is not always easy or even possible. You can speak up all you want and still be shut down. That can get frustrating, and I'm not sure I'll have much patience for that. Having our kids learn at home, however, would not be ideal for us.

As Brian and I continue on our journey as parents, I only pray that we can continue to make good educational decisions for our children. We are both products of public education and consider ourselves to be pretty faithful and educated Catholics. As we forge ahead, we hope and pray that our presence wherever our children attend school will have a positive influence and lead to changes in the education system.

Whether you homeschool or send your kids off, happy back to school! Prayers for everyone for a blessed and successful year!

He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not

From our first Christmas "In Love"

Six years ago today, Brian and I said "I love you" to each other for the very first time. We had been dating for five days and had know each other 17 days. Some of you may be saying, "Wow. That was fast." I'm pretty sure it gave my parents heart attacks (and when Matthew announces that he and his girlfriend of a week have said those words to each other, I may have a total internal melt down), but for us, it was totally perfect. Part of it had to do with the fact that we met online. Those first six emails we exchanged were long and in depth and took hours to write. We learned a lot about each other right from the start. But we also spent our first two dates talking for hours and hours. We loved learning about each other and did it pretty quickly. It wasn't hard to fall totally in love with each other. And I can't even pinpoint the moment I realized I loved Brian. At some point, it just felt natural to think of him and feel "in love" all at the same time. Neither of us hesitated the first time we said those three little words either. There was no awkward pause. It just flowed naturally. That same night we both discussed marriage and decided at that point that that was where our relationship was ultimately headed. It was a night of revelations. And it's one we always look back at fondly.

All that being said, I had never said "I love you" to anyone outside of my family before Brian came along. At sixteen, I had discerned my vocation was to be a wife and mother, so I never wasted my time dating the guys at high school (pretty sure they weren't interested in the crazy Catholic girl either.) I had been interested in several guys in college and had gone on a handful of dates, but the relationships never progressed past "friendship" (some never even got to that level!). All of that also meant that I'd never waste those three precious words on anyone else. I wanted to say them to my future husband and to him only. They were words meant just for him and give them away to someone else would somehow cheapen their meaning in my mind.

I can't say what a HUGE blessing that has been for our relationship and marriage. I got to discover what love is and how it works with Brian. I had no one before him to discover that amazing adventure with, and because of that, Brian and I are even more bonded to each other than we would be otherwise. I didn't have a fear telling him I loved him because I knew I was meant to marry him and that meant that he'd never break my heart. I wasn't scared to put it all out on the line because having never done it before, I didn't even think that it may backfire at some point. My future spouse would never hurt me, and so I need not worry that the love I felt for him wouldn't be returned. It wasn't stressful or scary to say "I love you" the first time.

Having saved those words for Brian has also made him realize what an incredible he was getting to be the one to hear me say them for the first time. I remember how beautiful and innocent he found the whole scene. And how touched he was that he was the one God had chosen to hear those three precious words. He felt honored and took the job of protecting my heart and treating it delicately very serious right from the start.

To me, it made sense to save "I love you" for my future husband. First and foremost, I didn't want my future husband out there running around and telling some other girl that he loved her. So why would my future husband want me out there telling some other guy I loved him even if it wasn't really love? That thought just hurt my heart (and honestly, it was something I had to work hard to overcome in our relationship. Even Brian will say when he said those words before he never truly  knew what it meant to be in love until he met me, and that helps a bit.) I have never been one to believe that you can be "in love" multiple times throughout life. Love means sacrificing yourself for the good of your beloved. That kind of love is not found in teenage relationships. (Of course, there's always exceptions to the rule.) It's not found in the flirtatious college relationships where you wouldn't dare bring the other half of the relationship home to mom. Love is deep and intimate. You can't be deep and intimate with more than one person in a lifetime. Or at least I can't. God forbid something ever happen to Brian, I'm pretty sure I couldn't remarry simply because I'd always be in love with him. I'm pretty certain I could never love again. (And I get some people do remarry and love again, but for me, emotionally, it just wouldn't work.)

I can only hope and pray that I somehow pass on this idea and sentiment to our children. I'm not sure how to do that, and I'm not really sure how my parents passed on such an idea to me without me knowing they were doing it. I hope one day I get them to understand that words are powerful, especially love. Love means so much more than being giddy and happy and just attracted to another person. It means be willing to sacrifice EVERYTHING to make the other person happy. Love doesn't contain the selfish idea of "I." It is all about someone else. I hope to teach them that love is what they see on the cross. And until they are willing to totally give their life for the other person, those three words have no business in their relationships with the opposite sex. Ultimately, though, I hope they can look at Brian and I and see how very much in love we are still are and think, "I want that." And realize that the only way to get "that" is to play their cards like we did. I pray they love their future spouses enough to save everything for them, including three of the most important and unfortunately, overused words in the English language.

To end, I love you, Brian. I have since six years ago, and I always will. Thank you for loving me like you do. :)

The Cross of NFP

Disclaimer: This post is not directed at anyone or meant to offend anyone. Some things have happened over the past week that have left me a bit bummed out about postponing another baby, and as I prayed about it on the treadmill today, these thoughts came to mind. 

I read a blog entry a few weeks ago during NFP Awareness Week called "NFP Sucks." And, yes, on some days it does really stink, but this is not what this post is about. No, I don't believe NFP truly stinks (my mother taught me to never use the word sucks, and I will be darned if I start using it now.) I do believe it to be a beautiful thing that, when practiced correctly, can lead to many blessings for a marriage. However, sometimes having to use NFP for a period of time can really be a cross.

I will start out by saying how bothered I get when it is clear Brian and I are being judged outright for using NFP right now. I'm not about to go through our reasons for postponing our next child (they really are no one's business but ours and God's and sometimes Father Jim's when I seek his counsel in confession.) But we do have some concerning and legitimate reasons for postponing. Sometimes when other Catholics find out we are postponing, they look at us like we are crazy. And the judgement begins.

From the outside looking in, what more could we need? We went on vacation, we go on date nights, we do fun things as a family. Money can't be that tight. We seem to be super happy. There can't be an emotional reason, can there? Unless they can look into our souls, they will never truly know the legitimate (the correct translation of the word grave in Italian) reasons we have chosen to postpone our next baby.

There's a line of thinking from some Catholics who don't support the use of NFP to postpone babies in any situation in modern countries. They themselves have chosen to just "trust God" and let Him decide the size of their family. And that's beautiful and wonderful. (really it is! I admire those with large families very much. I meant that in all sincerity. It's when the judging starts that I get uneasy.) NFP is recognized by the Church as a legitimate (yep, I am totally going to kill that word today) form of family planning. Those who choose not to use NFP are no better than Brian and I. They aren't somehow holier or closer to getting to Heaven than we are. I applaud them for being able to and willing to just let God decide their family size. That's cool. But what we are doing in our marriage as parents is pretty cool, too. We are trying to plan our family based on our circumstances and personal spiritual life. The cool thing about NFP is that it allows us to remain open to life during every marital act. So this idea that those of us who use NFP are not open to life is just not correct.

But my biggest issue that I think often times is overlooked by those who don't support using NFP is the fact that needing to use NFP can be a HUGE cross. Those who have large families sometimes see the sacrifices they have to make in order to support those large families as crosses. Well, having to have a smaller family at a slower rate than what you intended can also be a cross.

Here's the thing. I LOVE babies. (Well, once they get to be about five months old and sleep trained and nursing less, I LOVE babies. For the first five months, I go into survival, "Oh my gosh. Brian, don't touch me. I'm never doing this again" mode.) Brian also LOVES babies. I'm pretty sure he likes parenthood more than I do! We long to give our children a house full of siblings because I was an only child and he was one of two and we both see how lonely that is as adults. We want to procreate and fill the world with little, life loving Catholics to combat the Culture of Death. We believe part of marriage is bringing children into this world if you are able to physically do so. We would both love nothing more than to delete the NFP app tonight and let things happen as they may. But right now, we just can't.

And that's hard. Really, really hard. It is a cross to want so badly to bring another life into this world, but to also know at the same time, that now is just not the time and God is just asking you to wait a little longer. It is a cross to constantly be surrounded by pregnant women and know that the time for you to have that baby belly again is at least a year, if not more, away. It is a cross when every month for two days all you do is think about babies and welcoming new life into the world only to be told by your NFP app that now is not the time for such thoughts! It is a cross to worry and wonder each month if when the time comes to delete the NFP app from your iphone if your body's fertility will still be working. And let's face it. Not being able to be intimate in a marriage when you really, really want to can certainly be a cross. Oh that reminds me...when you plan your 5 year anniversary weekend getaway a year in advance and suddenly realize that it's not really during the best time of your cycle, NFP is an even bigger cross! It's hard! Using NFP at times definitely means sacrificing what you want for the betterment of your family, spouse, marriage, health, etc, etc.

I totally get that we are all called to carry crosses with Christ and to sacrifice for Him and with Him. I just find it funny that many overlook what a HUGE cross using NFP can be. It's heavy some days, and sometimes, I just want to throw it away. But Christ didn't do that with His cross, and we won't with this cross either. But wouldn't it be great if those of us who have legitimate reasons to use NFP and those of us who choose not to use it could just smile and get along? Wouldn't it be awesome if we could both recognize in each other the sacrifices and crosses in our lives without getting all judgemental? Maybe both sides of the issue could support each other in striving to live out God's Will for their own marriages. Neither side is better than the other. And using NFP and not using NFP can be filled with sacrifices and crosses.

For now, I will end by saying that I am thankful for the gift and cross of NFP. Our marriage and life would not be the same without it. The blessings from it far outnumber the crosses most days. If you are curious as to what NFP is and how to use it, please message me. I have lots of great information. Lots. :) God bless and happy charting!

Two of our three biggest blessings to come from using NFP. :)